Adoption Update

The next major step in our adoption is for our case to go to court in Ethiopia. Once this happens, Anna will legally be our child (according to Ethiopia). We would then travel to Ethiopia when we get a U.S. Embassy appointment which is usually 4-6 weeks after a successful court date.

We were informed in December that we were likely to have a court date in early January. Well, early January came and we did not hear of a court date. But then on Friday we received an email that told us that our court date had been on that very day, but it was unsuccessful because not all pertinent parties were present.

The next attempt at court will come on January 23rd. Hopefully everything will be in order on that day so that Anna can come to our home quickly.

Christmas!

For the last decade or so we have always been on the road for Christmas. This year, due to the way the schedule worked out, we were able to be home for F.G.’s and K.D.’s first Christmas in America. We went to church on Christmas Eve and then came home, built a fire, read the Christmas story, and then slept “under” the Christmas tree. It was fun to wake up in the morning and to not have to drag myself out of bed to go down and open presents. I was already there. Here are some fun shots from it all.

December Photos

Just a few photos to share. We made our annual trip "down south" to our favorite Christmas tree farm. It was a perfect day - great packing snow on the ground and a warm sun in the sky. F.G. made a little snowman which she hauled all the way back to the front. F.G. then walked up to the manger scene they had set up and set her snowman down next to the wise men. It was just the right size to fit in.




Every year CrazyMom and some of her friends get together to make sugar cookies with all of the kids. Imagine 17 kids, flour, frosting, and those dreaded sprinkles. Now that you have that picture in your head maybe you can understand why the men gathered at a different house to work on finishing a basement. Here is a shot of one of the tables.


Our kids never cease to amaze us with the things they dream up. F.G. and Little Foot were outside playing in the snow and somehow they ended up making a large snow head for Little Foot. It was all fun and games until Little Foot got a little off balance and the weight of the snow head pulled his real head backwards to the ground. He didn't put it back on after that . . .


F.G. and K.D. got the idea of dressing up one day and went all through the kids' drawers looking for clothes of the right color. K.D. is a reindeer and F.G. is a Santa worker. She tried riding K.D., but it did not go so well.

Hunger

One of the ongoing themes during the Christmas season is helping those in need. In thinking about the needs that people have in the world and my almost total insulation from them, I was reminded of something that happened in our home a few months back. We were all having supper together and the conversation turned to rocks and dirt. My birth kids were making jokes about eating dirt and what it would taste like when K.D., who is five, said,

“This one, I try this one,” indicating with his hand that he had eaten some dirt before.

“You ate some dirt?” I asked.

“Yes, this one. Me so hungry, me try this one,” he said indicating again how he put the dirt in his mouth.

“Really?” I said.

“Yes, but this one no good,” he offered scrunching up his face and waving his finger back and forth in the air.

The conversation moved on and K.D. moved along with it as if nothing big had just been said. It was one of those matter-of-fact moments for him. It was just how life was.

Many young children in America put dirt in their mouths sometime in their lives out of curiosity. I assume I probably did it too when I was young. But few of us know what it is like to be hungry, truly hungry. This no-end-in-sight hunger is the sort of thing that leads a child to the point where he is willing to try anything, even dirt, to make the hungry feeling go away. And, after a brief delusional moment of hope as they place the dirt in their mouths, reality sweeps back in.

It is a sobering thought that many children across the world will be putting dirt into their mouths today trying to make the hungry feeling go away. It causes me to pause and to wonder if I am doing enough for them. I don’t know if I can ever do enough, but I realize that I can always do a little more.

First Thanksgiving

“It is fun?” F.G. was earnestly asking CrazyMom. F.G. knew Grandma R and Grandpa R were coming and that the other kids were excited, but she could not figure out why.

“It is fun if you like to eat,” said CrazyMom.

F.G. gave up on trying to figure out what the big deal was about having a meal and decided just to wait and find out.


Well, it was a BIG meal. CrazyMom did not hold back at all. At the end of the meal she said, “So that was it. Was it fun?” F.G. agreed that it was.

K.D. did not think so, however, because of a new discovery he made at the thanksgiving table – stuffing. When he asked for his fifth serving, I gave it to him. It is hard to tell anyone no when you are not saying no to yourself. Well, for the rest of the day he walked around the house saying that his tummy hurt as he gingerly held his stomach with both hands. It was a good lesson, I suppose. At supper the next night he asked for more food and then, after a moment’s reflection, decided against it.

Update on Anna

Now that CrazyMom and I are in the middle of adopting again, we have a better idea of what to expect. This does not make the waiting any easier.

The first phase of adopting is bearable because YOU are doing things to make it happen. You are running here and there collecting endless notarized signatures attesting to your worthiness. If you want to make your adoption happen faster, you can run around faster, make persistent calls to dislodge papers languishing on desks, or pay more to Fed-Ex documents around.

But then you complete your dossier and send it in. It is done. There is nothing more that is in your control. All that is left to do is to wait while your paper work travels the world and sits on unknown desks. Weeks go by and you wonder, "What if it has been put on the wrong pile?" or "What if it has fallen off the pile onto the floor?"

But then a glimmer of hope comes. Our glimmer came in the form of an email from our agency.

Subject: Group Z

Hi CrazyD and CrazyMom,

I have been informed that your case was submitted to court and included in Group Z. The court date will be scheduled for early January. Once your case successfully passes court, you will be able to travel to Ethiopia approximately 4 weeks later to bring home Anna (most likely early to mid February).

Thanks and congratulations!
Sally

Just a few lines of text and yet the landscape has shifted. Our paperwork has not been lost. Something must be happening somewhere which means someday Anna will come.

May that day come quickly.

Learning to Read

Having adopted older children (5-8) from Ethiopia that do not speak English, it has been fascinating to watch them take on the language. Since we live with them, it is hard to see the growth every day. But then something happens and you say, "Wow!" as you realize that since the last time you noticed, some substantial growth has taken place.

This happened to me the other night when I saw K.D. reading before bed. Yes, I said reading. I quickly grabbed the video camera to capture a few moments of it. Keep in mind that K.D. did not know his Amharic or English letters when he came to us 9 months ago.

CrazyMom's Birthday

CrazyMom had a birthday recently. One of the great things about big family life is that whenever you are wanting a party you just have to go through the house and round up all of the kids. Of course, when you are wanting a little peace and quiet . . .


Before you watch the following video of the kids singing happy birthday to CrazyMom, an explanation is in order. We have some good friends (CountryDad and CountryMom) that had this tradition. Whenever one of their girls was having a birthday, CountryDad would "warm up" his voice by singing "la-la-la-la" at an ever increasing volume and as far off key as he could. I witnessed this many times both in his home and, much to the embarrassment of his girls, in public restaurants. His girls always seemed to have that look in their eyes that said, "Yes, I know you love me dad, now could you please stop it!" Anyway, my kids just loved it and now we "warm up" our voices as well right before singing happy birthday.



Here is CrazyMom enjoying her favorite ice cream (coconut almond chip), her favorite beverage (coffee), and one of her favorite cakes made by the girls (white cake with white frosting covered in coconut).



The kids made presents for CrazyMom and I also took the kids to the dollar store so they could buy her things as well.













I got CrazyMom a gift to fit a homeschooling mom - a photocopier. Yeah, I know men aren't suppose to buy their wives electronics for their birthdays, but she does seem to really like it and has used it a lot already. Who wants flowers anyway? You can't even plug them in to keep them fresh.

CrazyMom, Mass Emails, and Smores

CrazyMom knows best. Of course, you already knew that. There is all of the obvious stuff, like what would make for a good dinner, if that orange shirt should go in the red laundry pile or the bright laundry pile, and how to comfort a child when they suffer a significant loss – like somebody drawing on their Sunday school paper which we throw out every week anyway.

But there are other ways in which CrazyMom knows best - ways that involve me. We were at a home school conference this summer and CrazyMom took a liking to some guy who was funny and had written a book or something. When we walked by his booth, she told me that she had signed me up to receive “encouraging emails” from the guy. Being the cynic that I am, I knew that I would not become a better father by reading some funny guy’s mass emails. I was also not sure if CrazyMom thought that I might LIKE the emails or, due to some deficiency in me, she thought I NEEDED the emails.

Well the emails started coming. I don’t even think I read the first few and instead noticed how fast I could delete them. Then the title of one caught my eye and I read it and thought it was OK. Then I read a few more and found them, well, kind of encouraging.

I got this one email and it was talking about . . . well, here . . .I will just give you an excerpt:

I’m thinking that this Friday or Saturday night would be the perfect time for a little marshmallow roasting. About the only drawback is that it’s pretty much a big pain. In my head I picture laughing, roasting, and singing. In reality, it’s gooey hands, potential 3rd degree burns, and flaming sticks being swung around like light sabers. I’m sure I’ll do more yelling than singing---but you know what? It’s worth it.

I know that there is no better feeling than to sit around a warm fire with the people you love the most. In fact, if I were only given 24 hours to live, I would spend at least a couple of those hours around the campfire with my family.

So, Dad, let me encourage you to enjoy some of that good, God-given fall weather with your family this weekend. Make a campfire, go pick apples, drink apple cider, or make s’mores.

The email gave me a real hankering to do s’mores with my kids despite the hassle it would be. Ever since, I have been keeping an eye out for the perfect night and tonight it came. The weather was unseasonably warm and the air was still. We did the campfire/s’more thing despite the fact that it was a Tuesday night. It was great.

Any by the way, dads. You can sign up for the emails at Family Man Web.

Top 10 from the First 100

Note: Things have been crazy for the last few weeks and I couldn't keep all of the balls in the air, but I have now picked the blog back up off of the ground.

This is the 100th post. These arbitrary base 10 milestones seem like a time of reflection, so both CrazyMom and I looked back over the blog so far and picked out some of the posts that we liked the best.

CrazyD's Favorites

• Jesus Loves What?!?
  
• I am the Filthy Rich
  
• A Surreal Experience - Two Boys Touch Through a Pane of Glass
  
• How Bad Is It?
  
• What Have I Done?
  
• CrazyD's Icca
  
• An Irreplaceable Mom
  
• Traveling Trauma
  
• Crying in Ethiopia and Remembering Mom
  
• I Was Wrong. Adoption IS Risky.
  

CrazyMom's Favorites

• In for a Penny, In for a Pound
  
• Introducing Our New Children
  
• I am the Filthy Rich
  
• A Surreal Experience - Two Boy Touch Through a Pane of Glass
  
• A Heartfelt Thanks
  
• Lines, Lines, and More Lines
  
• CrazyD's Icca
  
• Pledge of Allegiance
  
• I Was Wrong - Adoption IS Risky.
  
• School in Ethiopia