Hunger

One of the ongoing themes during the Christmas season is helping those in need. In thinking about the needs that people have in the world and my almost total insulation from them, I was reminded of something that happened in our home a few months back. We were all having supper together and the conversation turned to rocks and dirt. My birth kids were making jokes about eating dirt and what it would taste like when K.D., who is five, said,

“This one, I try this one,” indicating with his hand that he had eaten some dirt before.

“You ate some dirt?” I asked.

“Yes, this one. Me so hungry, me try this one,” he said indicating again how he put the dirt in his mouth.

“Really?” I said.

“Yes, but this one no good,” he offered scrunching up his face and waving his finger back and forth in the air.

The conversation moved on and K.D. moved along with it as if nothing big had just been said. It was one of those matter-of-fact moments for him. It was just how life was.

Many young children in America put dirt in their mouths sometime in their lives out of curiosity. I assume I probably did it too when I was young. But few of us know what it is like to be hungry, truly hungry. This no-end-in-sight hunger is the sort of thing that leads a child to the point where he is willing to try anything, even dirt, to make the hungry feeling go away. And, after a brief delusional moment of hope as they place the dirt in their mouths, reality sweeps back in.

It is a sobering thought that many children across the world will be putting dirt into their mouths today trying to make the hungry feeling go away. It causes me to pause and to wonder if I am doing enough for them. I don’t know if I can ever do enough, but I realize that I can always do a little more.

First Thanksgiving

“It is fun?” F.G. was earnestly asking CrazyMom. F.G. knew Grandma R and Grandpa R were coming and that the other kids were excited, but she could not figure out why.

“It is fun if you like to eat,” said CrazyMom.

F.G. gave up on trying to figure out what the big deal was about having a meal and decided just to wait and find out.


Well, it was a BIG meal. CrazyMom did not hold back at all. At the end of the meal she said, “So that was it. Was it fun?” F.G. agreed that it was.

K.D. did not think so, however, because of a new discovery he made at the thanksgiving table – stuffing. When he asked for his fifth serving, I gave it to him. It is hard to tell anyone no when you are not saying no to yourself. Well, for the rest of the day he walked around the house saying that his tummy hurt as he gingerly held his stomach with both hands. It was a good lesson, I suppose. At supper the next night he asked for more food and then, after a moment’s reflection, decided against it.

Update on Anna

Now that CrazyMom and I are in the middle of adopting again, we have a better idea of what to expect. This does not make the waiting any easier.

The first phase of adopting is bearable because YOU are doing things to make it happen. You are running here and there collecting endless notarized signatures attesting to your worthiness. If you want to make your adoption happen faster, you can run around faster, make persistent calls to dislodge papers languishing on desks, or pay more to Fed-Ex documents around.

But then you complete your dossier and send it in. It is done. There is nothing more that is in your control. All that is left to do is to wait while your paper work travels the world and sits on unknown desks. Weeks go by and you wonder, "What if it has been put on the wrong pile?" or "What if it has fallen off the pile onto the floor?"

But then a glimmer of hope comes. Our glimmer came in the form of an email from our agency.

Subject: Group Z

Hi CrazyD and CrazyMom,

I have been informed that your case was submitted to court and included in Group Z. The court date will be scheduled for early January. Once your case successfully passes court, you will be able to travel to Ethiopia approximately 4 weeks later to bring home Anna (most likely early to mid February).

Thanks and congratulations!
Sally

Just a few lines of text and yet the landscape has shifted. Our paperwork has not been lost. Something must be happening somewhere which means someday Anna will come.

May that day come quickly.

Learning to Read

Having adopted older children (5-8) from Ethiopia that do not speak English, it has been fascinating to watch them take on the language. Since we live with them, it is hard to see the growth every day. But then something happens and you say, "Wow!" as you realize that since the last time you noticed, some substantial growth has taken place.

This happened to me the other night when I saw K.D. reading before bed. Yes, I said reading. I quickly grabbed the video camera to capture a few moments of it. Keep in mind that K.D. did not know his Amharic or English letters when he came to us 9 months ago.

CrazyMom's Birthday

CrazyMom had a birthday recently. One of the great things about big family life is that whenever you are wanting a party you just have to go through the house and round up all of the kids. Of course, when you are wanting a little peace and quiet . . .


Before you watch the following video of the kids singing happy birthday to CrazyMom, an explanation is in order. We have some good friends (CountryDad and CountryMom) that had this tradition. Whenever one of their girls was having a birthday, CountryDad would "warm up" his voice by singing "la-la-la-la" at an ever increasing volume and as far off key as he could. I witnessed this many times both in his home and, much to the embarrassment of his girls, in public restaurants. His girls always seemed to have that look in their eyes that said, "Yes, I know you love me dad, now could you please stop it!" Anyway, my kids just loved it and now we "warm up" our voices as well right before singing happy birthday.



Here is CrazyMom enjoying her favorite ice cream (coconut almond chip), her favorite beverage (coffee), and one of her favorite cakes made by the girls (white cake with white frosting covered in coconut).



The kids made presents for CrazyMom and I also took the kids to the dollar store so they could buy her things as well.













I got CrazyMom a gift to fit a homeschooling mom - a photocopier. Yeah, I know men aren't suppose to buy their wives electronics for their birthdays, but she does seem to really like it and has used it a lot already. Who wants flowers anyway? You can't even plug them in to keep them fresh.

CrazyMom, Mass Emails, and Smores

CrazyMom knows best. Of course, you already knew that. There is all of the obvious stuff, like what would make for a good dinner, if that orange shirt should go in the red laundry pile or the bright laundry pile, and how to comfort a child when they suffer a significant loss – like somebody drawing on their Sunday school paper which we throw out every week anyway.

But there are other ways in which CrazyMom knows best - ways that involve me. We were at a home school conference this summer and CrazyMom took a liking to some guy who was funny and had written a book or something. When we walked by his booth, she told me that she had signed me up to receive “encouraging emails” from the guy. Being the cynic that I am, I knew that I would not become a better father by reading some funny guy’s mass emails. I was also not sure if CrazyMom thought that I might LIKE the emails or, due to some deficiency in me, she thought I NEEDED the emails.

Well the emails started coming. I don’t even think I read the first few and instead noticed how fast I could delete them. Then the title of one caught my eye and I read it and thought it was OK. Then I read a few more and found them, well, kind of encouraging.

I got this one email and it was talking about . . . well, here . . .I will just give you an excerpt:

I’m thinking that this Friday or Saturday night would be the perfect time for a little marshmallow roasting. About the only drawback is that it’s pretty much a big pain. In my head I picture laughing, roasting, and singing. In reality, it’s gooey hands, potential 3rd degree burns, and flaming sticks being swung around like light sabers. I’m sure I’ll do more yelling than singing---but you know what? It’s worth it.

I know that there is no better feeling than to sit around a warm fire with the people you love the most. In fact, if I were only given 24 hours to live, I would spend at least a couple of those hours around the campfire with my family.

So, Dad, let me encourage you to enjoy some of that good, God-given fall weather with your family this weekend. Make a campfire, go pick apples, drink apple cider, or make s’mores.

The email gave me a real hankering to do s’mores with my kids despite the hassle it would be. Ever since, I have been keeping an eye out for the perfect night and tonight it came. The weather was unseasonably warm and the air was still. We did the campfire/s’more thing despite the fact that it was a Tuesday night. It was great.

Any by the way, dads. You can sign up for the emails at Family Man Web.

Top 10 from the First 100

Note: Things have been crazy for the last few weeks and I couldn't keep all of the balls in the air, but I have now picked the blog back up off of the ground.

This is the 100th post. These arbitrary base 10 milestones seem like a time of reflection, so both CrazyMom and I looked back over the blog so far and picked out some of the posts that we liked the best.

CrazyD's Favorites

• Jesus Loves What?!?
  
• I am the Filthy Rich
  
• A Surreal Experience - Two Boys Touch Through a Pane of Glass
  
• How Bad Is It?
  
• What Have I Done?
  
• CrazyD's Icca
  
• An Irreplaceable Mom
  
• Traveling Trauma
  
• Crying in Ethiopia and Remembering Mom
  
• I Was Wrong. Adoption IS Risky.
  

CrazyMom's Favorites

• In for a Penny, In for a Pound
  
• Introducing Our New Children
  
• I am the Filthy Rich
  
• A Surreal Experience - Two Boy Touch Through a Pane of Glass
  
• A Heartfelt Thanks
  
• Lines, Lines, and More Lines
  
• CrazyD's Icca
  
• Pledge of Allegiance
  
• I Was Wrong - Adoption IS Risky.
  
• School in Ethiopia
  

F.G.'s First American Birthday

We celebrated F.G.'s 9th birthday on Friday and she was radiating the entire time. Some grandparents were suppose to come into town to help celebrate her birthday, but were prevented due to some health issues in our extended family. It was unclear to us whether or not F.G. would be sad about celebrating her birthday without them, but it turned out that nothing could keep her down.

We asked her who all of the presents were for and she said, "Me!" and threw her arms in the air. The above photo captures the moment.



One of the presents brought back some old memories for F.G. and she played a song that her Ethiopian mother had taught her, captured in the following video.



Our other kids were not quite as graceful with the drum and F.G. was not able to teach them how to do what she could do. Finally, she jumped on the couch behind Miss Bookworm and grabbed her hands to make them do what they were suppose to do.



It was a grand affair. F.G. felt all of the attention on her and she was thriving on it. It is too soon yet to know when she will come back down to earth.

Sparse News about Anna

We don’t have a lot of news about Anna to share, but here is what we have.

The last official information we received about her was from well over a year ago. We have a picture where she is wearing a hat and looking down and not much else. Based on what we were told then, we think she is now about 3 years old.

Anna was moved from where she was living in southern Ethiopia to an orphanage in the capital city, Addis Ababa, about 3-4 weeks ago. We are hoping that now that she is in Addis Ababa our new agency will be able to get updated information to us soon.

The courts in Ethiopia shut down for a couple of months each year and they are just re-opening now. We don’t know how big their backlog is nor when our papers will make it to court to be processed. We are currently guessing that we might be traveling to Ethiopia around January or so.

Someone from our agency is traveling to Ethiopia soon, so we get to send along a little welcome bag. We will pack the gallon size zip-lock with photos, a t-shirt, a doll, a few small toys, and a disposable camera. The camera will be used to snap some pictures of Anna and then it will be mailed to us to have the pictures developed. We don’t know how long it will take for the camera to come back to us. We are already anxiously awaiting its arrival and we have not even mailed it with the welcome bag yet.

Not much news, but in some sense not much is needed. We know Anna needs a home where she can be cared for and we are excited to be able to provide that home and bring her into our family.

Family Love

(Note: In the post Telling the Kids I mentioned Miss Bookworm reading a journal entry to the family. Here is that entry.)

We used to have a cat named Smokey who was a bit too feisty so we had to take him to the Humane Society. Some time later, we found two cats from the same litter that a person couldn’t keep. A few days later, Cocoa and Patches were a part of our family.

Their colors were very different. Cocoa was brown with dark stripes and Patches was Calico with patches of orange, black, and white. Patches was a jumper, pretty light weight, while Cocoa was a little heavy and lazy.

We found out a few months later that they fought just like brothers and sisters. We think Cocoa starts it. They start batting each other then become a blur of fur until Patches breaks away and Cocoa streaks after her. Patches ends the fight by gaining higher ground – Cocoa usually doesn’t follow her.

It is the same with us kids. Someone starts a fight and they start “batting” – hurling insults back and forth until one person breaks away and gains “higher ground.” Higher ground is tattling to mom or dad.

But sometimes with Cocoa and Patches, Cocoa starts licking Patches, just like sometimes the kids are nice.