On Mother's Day it is customary to give mom the day off. I did some of CrazyMom's usual stuff: emptied the dishwasher 3 times, cooked breakfast, and cooked lunch – dinner was self-serve cold cereal. But I wanted to do more. I thought one of the best ways to give CrazyMom the day off would be to give her a break from the endless questions she gets asked from our six kids. So I told the kids that if they have any questions to ask me, not CrazyMom.
It was early on Sunday morning when the first question came. I was working on making biscuits & gravy when Ed passed through the kitchen looking for CrazyMom.
"Where's Mom?"
"Why?"
"I need to ask her a question."
"Ask me. It's Mother's Day."
With a well-ok-if-you-really-think-you-can-answer-this look, Ed says, "Does this match?"
Ed was sporting a pink bandana on her head, a white blouse, and a pink skirt of a slightly different shade of pink. The scarf and the skirt were not actually pink, but I don't know the name of the actual color and pink is the closest thing in my vocabulary. You don't need to know color names, however, to know if something matches. I could see that the white blouse was definitely not a problem, but the bandana and the skirt I put in the "kind-of" match category.
Now here is the dilemma. If I say they match and sometime before now and the end of the day Ed finds out they don't match and that she should have worn her other pink bandana of a slightly different shade, she will be sad. On the other hand, if I say they don't match and she does not have another pink bandana of a slightly different shade, she will be sad. But I don't know if there is another pink bandana of a slightly different shade and so I can't answer the question. Argh.
"Go ask your mom," I say, already discouraged.
A smirking girl twirled on her heels and set off to find CrazyMom.
So I failed on the first question of the day and many more after that. I probably batted about a .300 for the day, which might keep me in the line up in baseball, but it feels pretty pathetic as a father trying to give mom the day off.
Oh well. I will try to numb the pain by telling myself that it is the thought that counts. Maybe CrazyMom had a better Mother's Day than I know. It must be satisfying to watch me demonstrate that she is an irreplaceable part of our family.
2 comments:
So did they match?? And did she have another pink bandana?
Mary, who has no idea why she feels this is important to know
Funny you should ask. I thought about whether or not to put this detail in and for some reason decided to leave it out.
They "kind-of" matched, but there was not another pink bandanna of a slightly different shade. CrazyMom told Ed that it was fine. Ed was content with the affirmation and everything about life was good because mom made it good.
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