Wednesday, October 10, 2007


On Saturday I needed to retrieve something from the master bath so I ran upstairs to get it. The door was closed and when I went to open it I found that it was locked. I thought that was pretty strange since I couldn’t recall any other time that I had found the door locked. I tried it again and sure enough it was locked.

I heard some noises inside and realized that CrazyMom was in there. We have not ever had a lock-the-master-bath-door type of relationship before and I was beginning to wonder if things might not be going as well between us as I had thought. Us men are often the last to know.

I tentatively knocked on the door.

“Who is it?” came the reply. My antennae were up to try to discern the tone in the voice and calculate how bad things might be. There was an inflection up in the voice, which was a good sign. Other tones, however, gave me the feeling that the question was being posed in a court of law so that the respondents name could be recorded. This would enable the court to ensure they were prosecuting the proper person for the egregious crimes they had committed.

“Umm. . . It’s me, CrazyD” I said, for some reason stating my name as if my wife would not recognize my voice.

There were noises from inside and a slight delay. My level of concern was rapidly rising.

Then the door opened and CrazyMom was smiling broadly.

“I was so going to nail a kid for trying to open the door without knocking first!” she said.

Turns out that CrazyMom, in her pursuit of sanity, had issued a decree from Mount Olympus to our six kids:

From this time forward, CrazyMom, in her capacity as answer-giver and request-fulfiller (but not in her capacity as a 911 operator), shall not be unduly disturbed for the 10.5 minutes that it takes her to shower and get dressed.

CrazyMom is fair game when she is drying her hair, however, provided you can yell your request loud enough.


Innocent Observer said...

I have a rule that unless you are bleeding or on fire you are not to talk to me when I am in the bathroom, even if you are talking loud enough for me to hear. And if I can hear you, the answer is NO!


Anonymous said...

good for her! :-) jcn

mom2babybirds said...

I have tried that in my own house, but it doesn't work, yet. 10.5 minutes isn't too much to ask:)